Kazakhstan: THE LIST

In about a week, I'll be home.
In about a week, I'll be HOME?!
Weird.

Anyway, what a year it's been! Carolina and I
were in a taxi yesterday, and we rode past the
huge "TARAZ" sign and tried to remember our
thoughts as we rode into Taraz for the first time
last August. And SO much has changed since
then. Here's a few of the more interesting things:

I don't bat an eye when served:

Pure animal fat.

Horse meat.

Any other part of a horse (intestine, liver, fermented milk).

Sheep guts.

Incredibly stale bread.

Jellied fat salad.

I don't find it unusual to:

Cook three meals a day.

Slide my bare feet into some stranger's slippers upon entering his house.

Be asked to take a picture with a total stranger on the street.

Stand and give a five minute toast at a birthday party, regardless of whether or not I know the person being celebrated and regardless of whether anyone else in the room actually speaks my language.

Find someone's hand in my pocket on the bus.

Be stopped by the police 4x/hour while on the road.

Have every single inch of my body touched by someone at the bazaar.

Wear high heels.

Flag down any old car to serve my transportation needs, negotiate with them a price, and just get in and go.

Light my stove –top burners and oven--with a match.

Be offered a tootsie-roll like candy, only to find out I'm eating sweetened coagulated bull's blood.

Have a pack of 9-year-old disciples, following me around yelling, "My name is Maksat! Where are you from! How old are you! How are you! I am from the Kazakhstan!"
Unplugging every outlet in my apartment before I leave so I still have an apartment when I return.

Be asked to stand and sing the American National Anthem on a moment's notice.

Wear the same clothes three days in a row.

Buy large quantities of bottled water.

Choose my meat by live animal.

Have a conversation in Russian or Kazakh.

Be looked up and down several times by every person I meet.

Buy unrefrigerated milk and yogurt that doesn't expire for 18 months.

I have a hard time remembering:

What it's like to have ice in my drink.

What a smile without a single gold tooth looks like.

What it's like to have reliable electricity.

Why I ever flushed toilet paper down the toilet.

When receiving a letter didn't feel like Christmas morning.

Why in the world food costs so much in the United States.

How wonderful it was to sit on a chair to eat dinner instead of the floor.

What it feels like to be surrounded by English-speaking people.

What lettuce, milk, avocado, wheat bread, diet coke, and good food in general tastes like.

A time when I didn't fear sparks or smoke when plugging something into the wall.

What in the world I ever used a dishwasher, dryer, or microwave for.

What it's like to have normal poop.

How I ever woke up when I didn't have the Mus1!m call to pr-yer to wake me at 5:30[ish]am.

I find it funny that:

I've flown about 20x more miles than I've driven this year.

I correct grammar regularly, and yet, almost all of the English I hear comes out something like, "I go to the nature today."

Sheep are sacrificed on a regular basis in the courtyard right outside of my window. One minute, you hear a bleating sheep, the next minute, you see a bleeding sheep, the next minute, you see only sheep parts, and 15 minutes later, just wool and blood…

Children don't wear diapers here. Instead, their parents just pull down their pants and let them pee where ever they happen to be: at the bazaar, on the side of the road, out the car window, in the stairwell of my building…and the kids just pee. Lovely.

I get scolded on a regular basis for: whistling inside (You'll lose all your money!), sitting on the
floor (You'll never have children!), drinking anything cold (You'll get sick!), and sitting at the corner of a table (You'll never get married!).

So, there's your little Kazakh culture lesson for the day.
Pretty cool gig I've got over here, huh?
(you don't have to pretend that you're not jealous
of my little Kazakh life. It's a pretty cool life.)

This is my life for just one more week.
This is my life for JUST ONE MORE WEEK?!

What an incredible adventure this past year has been,
and if only I could make a list like this of all the incredible
things the Father has done and is doing over here....
But, I can't wait to tell you these things in person.
In a WEEK. (??!)

My heart really is all over the world tonight.