Bone Marrow, Cat Sex, and What Exactly Went Down.

The low down on what’s up (sorry there's no pictures in this post. i do realize that makes you 90% less likely to actually read what's written below.):

I’ve been getting a lot of people wanting to know exactly what’s been going down over here in Baku. Well, the answer to that question is neither short nor simple but I’m absolutely willing to give it, so press on.

We arrived in Baku two weeks ago today—September 7^th. (I’m really starting at the beginning here, so skip to the end if you wish. But if you skip to the end, you’ll miss the stories about sweetened sheep fat and cat sex, and believe me, those are not stories you want to miss.) We were met at the airport by our administrators, given a by-car tour of city, and driven to our host home. Actually, host mansion. Actually, I think it’s more appropriate to say host mansion penthouse on the top floor of one of the highest buildings in Baku. And we were given the entire top floor, which included a massive bedroom, two bathrooms, a sauna, a diplomatic office, a beautiful kitchen, and lots of other space. AND, a huge wrap-around deck with an outdoor kitchen and grill and a panoramic of Baku and beautiful view of the Caspian Sea. My new digs. Umm, whoa.

Living with a host home isn’t just the digs, though. It’s Azeri Culture 101. For example, I quickly learned that everybody stays up until 3am, then sleeps until 10am, gets up for breakfast, has lunch around 5pm, and then dinner around midnight. The women never leave the house, and they wait on the men, and that’s totally normal. The first time I were asked down for dinner at midnight, I was asleep. The second time, I was in pajamas. The third time? I was ready and waiting. But all in all, the food was the biggest adventure. Among my weirder culinary adventures, I experiences three straight days of sweetened sheep fat—sometimes wrapped in Turkish lavish, sometimes spread on bread, sometimes just handed to me on a spoon. Yum. Also, I ate my fair share of sour yogurt soup, which is served ice cold. Basically, it’s like eating a whole bowl full of vegetable dip. Now, that’s not really that bad for a bite or two. But an entire bowl, especially when you take a bite expecting something like steaming hot cream of chicken, is entirely overwhelming. I was also served a plate full of boiled goat livers, and was given lessons on how to suck the marrow right out of beef bones. I mean, I don’t even eat mean on the bone because all the different colors gross me out. And then, really, just snap it off and suck out the slimy bovine stem cells? Maybe I’ll bring this little culinary treasure back to the states with me.

Another things I couldn’t ever have gotten used to: searching for my pajamas every night. You see, our host family had a cleaning lady, and she cleaned our room, and I put my pajamas under my pillow every morning. Well, she clearly didn’t think that was an appropriate pajama spot. Every night before bed, I went pajama hunting.

So, immediately after arriving, we began having problems with the school that invited me to teach. This was also the school through which I was supposed to start processing a visa with immediately after entering the country. One thing led to another, which led to another, which led to another, and so on. The last few meetings at my school were pretty stressful. Here’s the low down on a few of those meetings:

Thursday: This was get down and dirty and be confrontational and make visa progress day. Unfortunately, Geoff (teaching partner) had some NASTY food poisoning, so I was left to face my three male Azeri administrators. Needless to say, I had a few things working against me: #1—I’m a woman. (we’re not in the land of equal opportunity anymore, folks.) #2—I was only 1 of 4 total people in the room. #3—Clearly, I know nothing about how great it is when you just know the right people, and that I shouldn’t actually worry one single big about getting a visa. Needless to say, this meeting (that lasted 2 ½ hours) stressed me out a little. Proof of stress: on my way home, I bought a chocolate bar. I know what you’re thinking—Jillann, you don’t even LIKE chocolate! Tell me about it, friend. But regardless of the fact that in my right mind I would never eat a chocolate bar, I sat down and ate HALF of it. Like, just ate it. And I used to think I wasn’t affected by stress.

Sunday: I got a call LAST minute from one of my administrators telling us that we needed to meet them at the school so we could go visit another school that we would be partnering with. So, we got on the Metro and headed to school. We got there a bit early so we took a seat in the shade and took about 20 minutes together to lift the whole situation up to our Father. Since neither of us were feeling great about the situation at this point, we had a lot to lift up. About 10 minutes into our time before the throne, we started hearing this really loud whispering from someone near us, almost like hissing. Over and over, we kept hearing this ridiculous “Tssssssssssssssssss.” But you know, we were really into the pryr, and we didn’t even look up. And then, “AMEN.” At this point, we looked up, only to find a man standing about 3 feet away from us, facing us and bending over at the waist, and HISSING at us. Um, really? It took a few more hisses for us to figure out that he was not actually hissing at US, he was hissing at the cats behind us. Cats who had, just TWO FEET BEHIND US, started getting it on. Like, no holds barred, full fledged, I-hope-your-kittens-can’t-see-you-or-they’ll-be-scarred-for-life schnizzy. Seriously, Cats, have some dignity and GET A ROOM.

Monday: Together with our home office, we decided that ESI and this school were not on the same page, and we ended our contract with them. But MAN, the peace we asked for filled that room during and incredibly difficult and uncomfortable conversation. G is good that way, isn’t he?

So, where does this leave us now? With so much up in the air, we’re searching for a new school and TRUSTING our Father to provide. We’ve moved out of our host home and into a temporary situation with a single American girl we’ve gotten to know. We’re working on exploring other options for attaining a visa (since we no longer have an inviting organization). Join us in confidently asking HIM to provide (asap!) the school he wants us at next and to pave the way to an easily attained year-long multiple entry visa. Ask for wisdom, for confidence, for a stress-free transition, and for us to see G glorified in ALL of this. HIS power is made perfect in our weakness!

So, that’s the low down. Keep lifting us up!